Tuesday, July 17, 2012

But what if they don't turn out?

Isn't this a pretty rose?  Even after weeks of over 100 degree
temperatures, it still produced such a pretty flower- smells good too!

You know, back when we were considering whether we should adopt or not, one of the big questions we considered was, "But what if our adopted children don't turn out very well?"  It kind of embarrasses me to write that now, but it was something we thought about.  I know that we are not the only ones because we have heard that concern from lots of other people who we have spoken with about adoption.  Some have told us that it is just too big a risk, and they are hesitant to adopt because of it.

There is no doubt that adopted children have issues to face that other children do not have.  Questions of who am I really, feelings of abandonment, and lack of self-worth can be some of the resulting feelings of being placed for adoption as an infant.  Older children can have troubles with attaching to their adoptive parents because they have lost trust.  But are these reasons to reject the child forever? 

These kids are out there already.  They will be adopted by somebody, or else grow up in foster care and never have a permanent family, whether we choose to adopt them or not.  As Andy likes to say, they have to grow up somewhere.  We can give them a good and loving home where they can learn about God, so how can we say no?

Andy reminded me of this important truth- we who have trusted Jesus as our Savior are all adopted by God.  Does God look at us first and think, hmm, I wonder if they'll turn out very well?  No, like Romans 5:7-8 says,

  Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man,
though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die.
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:
While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

I'm not saying the road will be easy, but it will be rewarding.  God has not promised us an easy road in this life, but adopting is a way that we can serve God by helping the helpless.  Really, if you let fear of the road ahead keep you from adopting, you are not listening to God but to yourself.  Andy and I have a favorite verse that has helped us numerous times in our married life.  It's Deuteronomy 31:8-
The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you;
he will never leave you nor forsake you.
Do not be afraid;
do not be discouraged.


  1. Thanks for being so honest in regards to adoption. I've really enjoyed reading your story.

  2. Thanks Julie, I'm never quite sure how people will take what I say- but hopefully it will be an encouragement to those who are considering adopting. I'm so so glad we adopted! And I'm glad for the good example I had of adoption from our extended family. (:


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